Marriages are made in heaven but sustained in earth. yes, this is true. What is marriage? Marriage is a legalised relationship between a man and a woman which the society honours and accepts. But today we see most of the marriages ending in divorce. Is this due to the changing demands of the society? or due to the various issues that one faces in their personal lives- finance, work stress, family pressure etc. Todays chaning lifestyle has become demanding on us, one has to balance work and home, add to it, in laws, parents, children, financial stress and with all this no time to communicate with the partner and the result- Misunderstandings, disagreements, arguements, fights. One leads to the other and we have the most bitter word staring at our face- DIVORCE. But do we really want a Divorce?  Is it really the easy way out as we think most of the times, “take a divorce and get out of this mess” Does it really work this way? I am sure most of us will answer in a negative -NO. Divorce is not what we want, its not the easy way out and certainly not one of the best options. So what do we do to save the marriage. A few tips on how to save the relationship-

COMMUNICATE CLEARLY

Communication is the key to any healthy relationship. Open and clear communication is an essential factor in all relationships since thats the best way to share our ideas, opinions, thoughts etc.

 Dont Hint, elaborate on your thoughts and communicate the same. Respect your partner, hear them out and try and understand their perspective. Try and evaluate each others points of view and come to a win win situation.

 Dont ignore each others needs. When your partner wants to talk, show your interest and listen to them, dont be busy watching TV or reading nespaper. This gives out the message that you are not interested in whatyour partner has to say and you would rather your partner shuts up.

 Dont always blame each other for things gone wrong. Dont level accusations at each other because this just gets the defence mechanisms working and the end result is a clash of the egos, where both of you are not willing to concede or even understand. Always put your feelings first, like “I get upset when you dont listen to me when i want to talk, instead you watch TV. This makes me feel as if you are disinterested in my issues” “I feel disturbed when you dont call and communictae your plans to me, this makes me feel as though you dont want to involve me in your decisions”.

When your partner enquires about your issues, dont say “Nothing, there is nothing to say or there is nothing troubling me”. This only puts an end to the communication. Always keep the doors open to any form of communication. Clear expression always makes life simple. Since its easy for both the partners to understand the thoughts, opinions, and feelings of each other. Marriage is always based on Trust. And trust develops through clear communication, and actions.

STOP ASSUMING

 Negative thoughts and assumtions spell a death knell for the most beautiful of relationships. When we think negative and assume we dont clarify. We believe our thoughts and assume various tings about our partners which lead to misunderstanding and fights. Never assume things, its always better to clarify things with your partner than assuming and believing incorrect assumptions. A clear and transparent relationship always sails through even the most difficult times, since a transparent relationship is always based on trust and love. ACKNOWLEDGEMENT Notice the little and big things about your partner, and compliment them once in a while. this will make them feel special and feel loved and cared.

THANKS AND APPRECIATION

 Always thank your partner for things that they do for you. Do not take your partner for granted. Thanking your partner means showing appreciation for the things they have done for you and the efforts that they have put towards making you feel happy. this would show them that you acknowledge their efforts and do not take them for granted. this will go a long way in making your relationship better.

APPRECIATE THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE

Mmake a list of all the good things that you admire about your partner. Communicate this to them and tell them how much you love and admire them for who they are.

TAKE ACTIVE INTEREST

 Take an active interest in all the things which are important to your partner. Listen to them attentively. Discuss about their hobbies, interests, career options etc. this would make them feel loved and cared.

 MAKE THEM FEEL SPECIAL

Make your partner feel special by doing something they like. Making breakfast, getting a bed tea, foot massage, taking them out for a candle light dinner. Surprise them at times with things they love.

 All these will go a long way in making the relationship lasting and beautiful.